My Website

<img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/Hot_pepper_2.gif"> Hello there, I'm Pepper! I'm a writer and artist from Mid-Michigan. Feel free to take a look around and, if you'd like, leave me a comment! Thanks for visiting me on the web! LINKS: (link-goto: "Home", (either: "Crystal", "Home", "Valentine", "4", "Wait", "Homepage", "Marrow")) (link-goto: "About", (either: "About", "ABOUT2", "AboutRydian")) (link-goto: "Guestbook", (either: "Guestbook","Guestbooke")) <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/drpepper.gif">

(force-input-box: bind _cmd, (either:"Hi! I don't understand what's going on. I keep... losing time? I apologize, my memory is so bad these days.... I feel like a different person every 5 minutes. It's like I'm being possessed. Am I losing my mind? Sometimes it feels like theres someone else in my mind, commenting on my daily activities. Do you know how to help me figure out what the heck is going on? Please respond.")) (seq-link:"Send!", "You sent this 5 times. Man, what's wrong with you?", "Nice try.","Hate to break it to you, but this user never existed in the first place.", "Delivery failed. Perhaps you need to change your attitude.", "You should get that checked out.") (link-goto: "Home", (either: "Crystal", "Home", "Pepper"))

I'm Zeph, and this is my website, or whatever. I'm gay as hell, tbh. Super bad at intro lines, ya know? Just read my pages or leave me a message idk. Thanks for reading. LINKS: (link-goto: "Home", (either: "Crystal", "Pepper", "Valentine", "4", "Wait", "Homepage")) [[Zeph's About]] [[Zeph's Guestbook]]

Name: Silas Age: 17 Pronouns: He/Him Location: Phoenix, AZ Like I said on the homepage, I'm a writer and artist. I've been writing since I was about [[4]] years old, when I found Microsoft Word [[2005]] and never stopped typing. Writing is really important to me! Here are my published works: [[i]] [[ii]] My interests include: Dr. Who, Star Trek, Depeche Mode, All Creatures Great and Small, and OMD!! My favorite doctor will forever be the fifth doctor. I met Paul McGann and Colin Baker once! Enough geeking out, though. That's actually wayyyyy too much information about little old lame me, sorry. (link-goto:"Home", "Pepper")

WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? ZAXA DOES NOT ALLOW VISITORS. NO ONE IS ALLOWED HERE. GET OUT OF HERE. TELL THE OTHERS TO LEAVE. TELL THEM TO RIP YOU OUT OF YOURSELF. TELL THE OTHERS TO RIP YOU OUT. SAY IT. GET OUT. DONT COME IN, DONT OPEN THE DOOR, YOU ARE NOT READY FOR WHAT IS ON THE OTHER SIDE. KEEP OUT. GET OUT. GET OUT. (link-goto: "GET OUT", (either: "Home", "Pepper"))

<img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/Zeph.jpeg" width="150px"> Hey, I'm Zeph. I'm 25, and I live in Lansing, Michigan. I'm a writer and photographer, you can see my photography portfolio below. I really like superhero TV shows and emo music. I used to be scared of dogs, but I really love them now. I have a dog named Gracie, she was a standard poodle. She looked like this: <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/gracie.jpg" width="200px"> I miss her so much. I can't wait to remember seeing her next month. She always loved toys. One day I'll be able to play with her again. Um, what else... I've always sucked majorly at writing bios. So let's end it here. (link-goto: "Home", (either: "Crystal", "Home", "Pepper", "Homepage", "4")) (link-goto: "Photography", (either: "Photography", "Photography1"))

Not created yet

<img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/four-1293836_1280.png" width="230px">CALM DOWN<img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/pay-634911_1280.png" width="230px">CALM<img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/pay-3208068_1280.png" width="230px">DOWN <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/counting-149954_1280.png" width="230px">DOWN <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/mathematics-1660867_1280.png" width="230px">DOWN<img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/neon-145088_640.png" width="230px"> <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/four-1293836_1280.png" width="230px">CALM DOWN<img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/pay-634911_1280.png" width="230px">CALM<img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/pay-3208068_1280.png" width="230px">DOWN <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/counting-149954_1280.png" width="230px">DOWN <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/mathematics-1660867_1280.png" width="230px">DOWN<img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/neon-145088_640.png" width="230px"> <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/four-1293836_1280.png" width="230px">CALM DOWN<img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/pay-634911_1280.png" width="230px">CALM<img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/pay-3208068_1280.png" width="230px">DOWN <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/counting-149954_1280.png" width="230px">DOWN <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/mathematics-1660867_1280.png" width="230px">DOWN<img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/neon-145088_640.png" width="230px"> <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/four-1293836_1280.png" width="230px">CALM DOWN<img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/pay-634911_1280.png" width="230px">CALM<img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/pay-3208068_1280.png" width="230px">DOWN <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/counting-149954_1280.png" width="230px">DOWN <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/mathematics-1660867_1280.png" width="230px">DOWN<img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/neon-145088_640.png" width="230px"> <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/four-1293836_1280.png" width="230px">CALM DOWN<img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/pay-634911_1280.png" width="230px">CALM<img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/pay-3208068_1280.png" width="230px">DOWN <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/counting-149954_1280.png" width="230px">DOWN <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/mathematics-1660867_1280.png" width="230px">DOWN<img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/neon-145088_640.png" width="230px"> (link-goto: "Pepper????", (either: "Crystal", "Home", "Pepper", "Valentine","Wait"))

<img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/4620_89458505348_2689520_n.jpg"> Are you okay? <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/4620_89458505348_2689520_n.jpg"> Are you okay? <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/4620_89458505348_2689520_n.jpg"> Are you okay? <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/4620_89458505348_2689520_n.jpg"> Are you okay? <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/4620_89458505348_2689520_n.jpg"> Are you okay? <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/4620_89458505348_2689520_n.jpg"> Are you okay? <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/4620_89458505348_2689520_n.jpg"> Are you okay? <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/4620_89458505348_2689520_n.jpg"> Are you okay? (link-goto: "Are you okay?", (either: "Crystal", "Home", "Pepper"))

2AM //By P By Pe By Pip By Pepper M By Z by Pepper// I can’t see myself anymore. When I dream, my soul is siphoned from this reality into the cracks between all that is and was, and when I wake, the universe can’t put me back together enough to resemble something human. It’s a difficult transition, and I cannot cope with the distance. Love, unbearably, remains distant; we’ve banished it to windowless, locked rooms within the mind. They threaten me with it: if you dream, you’re contagious. We must quarantine you. To consider loving something is to consider that there might be a higher power, found not in religion but in togetherness, in that kind of knowing. To love something is to flirt with the most petrifying of vulnerabilities, and we can’t have that; it’s too late, after all. She’s dead. You can’t resuscitate her, honey, give me your hands. She’s dead. You have to let go. I’m an only child, but I’m also the eldest child, and no one will ever love me if I’m so inconsistent with my lives. Oh, I’m sorry - I wasn’t myself for a moment. I’m sorry, do I know you? Where is the girl? Nevermind. I’m every childhood at once, devouring the memories of others until I rupture to fill up what I was never allowed to have. No one can love this: a shifting cloud of trapped souls, faces that must be built up like children’s toys, must be constructed statuesque from various plastic eyes and mouths and noses. It wasn’t supposed to end up this way. No one can love this: the feral, taloned girlthing that is just so hungry and just so scared. I don’t believe in miracles, always deceptive in the end. I’m sorry, do I know you? But, see: I want. The others that are me want. All of us, collectively, desire, which also cannot be coped with. Today I told my psychiatrist that I was tired of being mentally ill, that I’m at a point in my life where I need to feel alive but I just don’t know how. I have only lived in cheap, choppy animation. I have only lived in the corpses of others’ tolerance. Everyone here walked into the same abandoned building and I’m the only one who can’t find a way out. There’s no one left to desire me, and I still can’t find my way out. I can’t even be haunted; there’s no room for unfinished business. We’re all crammed. I’m sorry, the vehicle of my body is stuffed with history I’ve pocketed into each muscle to keep everything calm, to keep the girl from finding out, so there’s just no space left. I hope you understand. What was your name again? I want to be loved. I have never wanted anything more than a life with someone who craves me. I can’t feel touch anymore, and I don’t recognize what I see mirrored in the water. All of us, collectively, want. Do you understand what that means? Do you understand that we are hollow? Do you understand that we are God’s most beloved work-in-progress, that we never let our hair down, that we will never exhale around others? Do you understand what that means for us?

WARNINGS: //''Before you begin this game, understand the trigger warnings: ''// Heavily implied Child Sexual Abuse, Emotional Abuse, Domestic violence; Unreality; Eyestrain; Gifs; Discussion of mental hospitals & psychiatric abuse. How to play: Click through each link to navigate to a new page on our website. Many pages are different each time you click them. This is really experimental. Enjoy! (link-goto: "BEGIN.", "Pepper")

<img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/download20231005010329.png" width="350px"> HEY!!!! I'M CRYSTAL!! WELCOME TO MY HOMEPAGE!!!!! =3 I'm a [[16 yr old girl]] who really likes K-POP, Kerli, Pink Aesthetic, and Instagram. I love messing around with filters and making photo edits. I'm an aspiring actress!! I've been in 2 plays so far, both as a kid.... I still love theatre! I hope to [[major]] in it one day when I graduate. Oh okay I can link pages!! Some stuff: (link-goto: "Favorite Music", (either: "Favorite Music","Music2")) [[Dollz]] (link-goto: "Home", (either: "Pepper", "Home", "Valentine", "4", "Wait", "Homepage"))

I can’t see myself anymore. When I dream, my soul is siphoned from this reality into the cracks between all that is and was, and when I wake, the universe can’t put me back together enough to resemble something human. It’s a difficult transition, and I cannot cope with the distance. Love, unbearably, remains distant; we’ve banished it to windowless, locked rooms within the mind. They threaten me with it: if you dream, you’re contagious. We must quarantine you. To consider loving something is to consider that there might be a higher power, found not in religion but in togetherness, in that kind of knowing. To love something is to flirt with the most petrifying of vulnerabilities, and we can’t have that; it’s too late, after all. She’s dead. You can’t resuscitate her, honey, give me your hands. She’s dead. You have to let go. I’m an only child, but I’m also the eldest child, and no one will ever love me if I’m so inconsistent with my lives. Oh, I’m sorry - I wasn’t myself for a moment. I’m sorry, do I know you? Where is the girl? Nevermind. I’m every childhood at once, devouring the memories of others until I rupture to fill up what I was never allowed to have. No one can love this: a shifting cloud of trapped souls, faces that must be built up like children’s toys, must be constructed statuesque from various plastic eyes and mouths and noses. It wasn’t supposed to end up this way. No one can love this: the feral, taloned girlthing that is just so hungry and just so scared. I don’t believe in miracles, always deceptive in the end. I’m sorry, do I know you? But, see: I want. The others that are me want. All of us, collectively, desire, which also cannot be coped with. Today I told my psychiatrist that I was tired of being mentally ill, that I’m at a point in my life where I need to feel alive but I just don’t know how. I have only lived in cheap, choppy animation. I have only lived in the corpses of others’ tolerance. Everyone here walked into the same abandoned building and I’m the only one who can’t find a way out. There’s no one left to desire me, and I still can’t find my way out. I can’t even be haunted; there’s no room for unfinished business. We’re all crammed. I’m sorry, the vehicle of my body is stuffed with history I’ve pocketed into each muscle to keep everything calm, to keep the girl from finding out, so there’s just no space left. I hope you understand. What was your name again? I want to be loved. I have never wanted anything more than a life with someone who craves me. I can’t feel touch anymore, and I don’t recognize what I see mirrored in the water. All of us, collectively, want. Do you understand what that means? Do you understand that we are hollow? Do you understand that we are God’s most beloved work-in-progress, that we never let our hair down, that we will never exhale around others? Do you understand what that means for us? (link-goto: "Do you?", (either: "Pepper","Crystal", "Home", "Valentine", "4", "Wait", "Homepage", "Marrow"))

I am so tired and I am tired of the fact that I can't recognize tired anymore. Maybe it's just another thing in these nerves that are malfunctioning. I keep thinking my body is malfunctioning and the worst part is that it is, we’ve got the results but we don't know how to read them, we've got the results but I have a learning disability and the numbers don't add up so the extent of it is obscured by my other illnesses. I can't tell what is happening to me; all I know is that I don't want to die. I spent 21 years wanting to die and I don't want to die anymore. It's like I'm a child again. You know how children skin their knees or break bones and it's the worst pain they've ever felt because they are so so young and they are so so scared? I am finally living and I am finally spreading those years behind me into the sand at Silver Lake. That isn't me. That wasn't me. I’m not writing a metaphor about spreading my own ashes like this is some sort of beautiful, sanitized rebirth. That person isn't dead. They did not die, because I brought him-her-them back and swallowed each of us, not out of monstrousness - let's be real, that metaphor is getting a little trite in my writing by now - I swallowed them because they were born too early and they weren't ready and they needed someone to keep them safe for a little while longer. Maybe there's a way to keep them safe that doesn't involve consuming them, you've got a point, but here's what I'll counter with: I am supposed to consume myself, myselves. Not like that. When you make food for a loved one you do it because you want them to be healthy and nourished and whole and sustained. When I consume myselves I am doing it because I want us to be healthy and nourished and whole and sustained. Then I am just myself. Then I have been integrated. Do you understand now? See: I write in tangents. This is a stream of consciousness exercise, that's the point. In every other situation, tangents are less acceptable. My mind is pedaling at warp factor ten but it only drains power from my body. Paradoxical, hm? Maybe it's a cartoon trope. The stationary bike. The evil contraption. The power that must be given to force a greater power into this world and usually you don't get a choice. I think I've seen that happen on television but I just can't remember; my memories became a victim of ransomware, and now they are locked behind too many walls and I'm sorry, I just don't have the money to bail them out at the moment. What I am trying to say is that being tired, in my mind - which at this point barely resembles any earthly sort of consciousness - means that I am going to die, and I don't want to die anymore. I know I said that before, but this time I want to live because I want to live because I want to live because I want to live. I had to be hospitalized to realize that there is kindness in the world - right here in my own city! - and no, I'm not talking about the hospital, I'm talking about solidarity between strangers. I'm talking about how we looked out for each other when all we really knew about one another is that supposedly there was Something Wrong with each of us, something that the hospital could never fix, a wound that the staff would simply scratch open with their greatest force, gathering us in the group therapy circle to one at a time implant their hands inside each of us, rooting and exploring and exploiting around to swallow our presence in the Wrong Way until the profit has been hunted to extinction and there's nothing more that can be taken. In the hospital I talked to the other patients more than I had ever talked to anyone in my entire life. One man in there helped me stop being so afraid of men. The doctors didn't believe me when I told them about how his kindness in such a vulnerable state would perpetually change my perception of the world. They didn't believe me. They didn't believe me; we were mentally ill, our word could not be trusted. I think they want to keep us at our own throats - fangs or knives to our own skin, to the skin of our solidarity, either way - so we do not notice that while we starve and scrounge, their flesh is healthy and their blood pumps healthily and maybe it's not the wrong way to consume if you weren't the first one to knock out a tooth. Maybe it's justice. I think we can make our own justice; after all, there is Something Wrong That Cannot Be Fixed, so why not play into the stereotype? Why not embody the definition they have scarred into you without mercy? Most of us aren't even good at being bad people. We just don't want anyone else to hurt again, and to many people this desire is indistinguishable from atrocity. Where do you go from there? Another tangent. I'm straying from myself again. I wanted this to be about fear but I glimpsed outside of myself and - get this! - I am just tired. I am tired of everything being about fear. I am tired of being afraid of dying but I still don't want to die. The fear is what restrains you. The fear is just a zip-tie burning through the wrists. The fear, too, will be hunted and it will hunt, both of us in an inescapable narrative, trapped in an eternally turbulent arena until only one of us is left alive. I've never had a birthday party and I've never been whole and I've never felt serenity and I’ve never won a fight. It's faith. I look above and I hear its voice: I think it's time for you to appreciate the passage of time. I think it's time for you to emerge victorious. Do you think fear is afraid to die? (link-goto: "Do you?", (either: "Pepper", "Crystal", "Home", "Valentine", "4", "Wait", "Homepage", "Marrow"))

Come home, little girl. Come out of the tunnel. Go back to lunch hour. Come here. Help her. Help yourself. Bury yourself. Come home, little girl, we're waiting for you. We made you this way. We need your help. Would you take my hand? Would you follow me into the past? You'll find your way back, I promise. Come home, little girl. Come out of the tunnel. Go back to lunch hour. Come here. Help her. Help yourself. Bury yourself. Come home, little girl, we're waiting for you. We made you this way. We need your help. Would you take my hand? Would you follow me into the past? You'll find your way back, I promise. Come home, little girl. Come out of the tunnel. Go back to lunch hour. Come here. Help her. Help yourself. Bury yourself. Come home, little girl, we're waiting for you. We made you this way. We need your help. Would you take my hand? Would you follow me into the past? You'll find your way back, I promise. Come home, little girl. Come out of the tunnel. Go back to lunch hour. Come here. Help her. Help yourself. Bury yourself. Come home, little girl, we're waiting for you. We made you this way. We need your help. Would you take my hand? Would you follow me into the past? You'll find your way back, I promise. Come home, little girl. Come out of the tunnel. Go back to lunch hour. Come here. Help her. Help yourself. Bury yourself. Come home, little girl, we're waiting for you. We made you this way. We need your help. Would you take my hand? Would you follow me into the past? You'll find your way back, I promise. Come home, little girl. Come out of the tunnel. Go back to lunch hour. Come here. Help her. Help yourself. Bury yourself. Come home, little girl, we're waiting for you. We made you this way. We need your help. Would you take my hand? Would you follow me into the past? You'll find your way back, I promise. Come home, little girl. Come out of the tunnel. Go back to lunch hour. Come here. Help her. Help yourself. Bury yourself. Come home, little girl, we're waiting for you. We made you this way. We need your help. Would you take my hand? Would you follow me into the past? You'll find your way back, I promise. [[I PROMISE]]

(enchant:?link,(color:black))(seq-link:"_$)#::+ &%|p*s Professor REDACTED English 101H 09 September 2021", "Funerals In Hastings, MI", "About two years ago, my psychiatrist, after hearing my laments of missing memories and evaporating time, diagnosed me with dissociative amnesia. She explained it to me:","“When the brain is adequately traumatized,” she said, effectively giving me the eternal label of victim, “it can delete, or repress, the memories of the trauma to minimize distress.”","I realized, in that moment, why I was incapable of remembering anything from my childhood; it was so drenched in trauma that my brain eradicated every aspect of it. Of course, real life isn’t science fiction, and memories cannot be truly deleted, only hidden, but most of these memories still remain intangible.","The things I do remember, however, haunt me.", "For example: I was barely eleven.", "We lived in Arizona at the time, but we were on vacation visiting family members in Michigan", "My father, who had work responsibilities, claimed he would stay home and take care of his aging mother and our animals. ", "I was drawing — an illustration of several crayon butterflies taking flight.", "I began the second butterfly when my mother called home. She dialed in my grandmother’s number to check in with her.", "The phone rang, on and on like a sinister symphony, until she eventually picked up.","At first the conversation was normal; she asked how her day was, how our pets were faring in our absence.","Until — the brief, singular moment that would ultimately tarnish the rest of my life — she asked about my father.", "“How was Dennis’s day at work?” she asked.","I remember this — she was sitting on the bed, getting ready to go to sleep. The sheets were honey-colored, and silk. The headboard of the bed was encrusted with plastic clear gemstones.","Her response was a soft, forced giggle. “I don’t know,” my grandmother responded as her laughter increased. To this day, I still don’t know why she was laughing.", "“He’s not here.”","“No. He flew to Atlanta.”","I dropped my purple crayon.","My mother held her hand up to her mouth, because she knew the consequences and she knew the motivations. One never simply flies out of town without their partner’s knowledge for moral reasons."," My mother began to mimic the harrowing laughter; she thought it was a joke. I, too, thought it was a joke. My grandmother had a very unique sense of humor; it made sense.","“Yeah, he said he’s visiting a college friend. Now, what time should I feed the dogs again?”","“I have to go, my mother said.","The phone slowly slipped from her hand onto the floor with a violent thud. She laid back -- silent, stiff, like a deer about to meet its untimely fate with a Chevrolet Silverado....", "And then I heard her cries.", " It was quiet, at first, as if she was trying to restrain herself, but her restraint ultimately failed her as she broke into a wail. I ran over to the bed.", " Her tears formed dark spots on the sheets beneath. I climbed in next to her, and held her as tightly as an eleven year old was capable of.","“Mom?” I asked, my own tears threatening to come out. “Do you think he cheated on you?”","“I don’t know for sure, but… in my gut I can feel it, you know? I know what he did wasn’t good.”", "I remember in kindergarten telling my teacher that my mommy and daddy were never going to separate and would, instead, be together forever.", "That's another memory of my childhood that remains, one of the very few that I can grasp. The irony does not escape me.", "I am this broken thing, this shattered entity that can only ever shatter further, shatter on, like marching into battle.") (link-goto: "Home", (either: "Crystal", "Home", "Pepper"))

Is that all I was to him? Is that all I was? (force-input-box: bind _cmd, "I don't know.") No, really. Is that all I was? (force-input-box: bind _cmd, "I DON'T KNOW!!!.") Answer honestly. (force-input-box: bind _cmd, "Honestly?") Honestly. (force-input-box: bind _cmd, "Honestly? What do you think? Do you really think you'll ever be anything besides a malleable, porcelain-fragile little doll? Are you still taking your meds?") (link-goto: "Fuck you.", (either: "Crystal", "Home", "Valentine", "4", "Wait", "Homepage", "Marrow"))<img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/neon-145088_640.png" width="14px">

[[I PROMISE.]]

[[I. PROMISE.]]

I'm sorry I couldn't help you. I'm sorry it happened before you were you and we were us, before I was here, before you had strength, before everything and all things and the big bang and the last ray of sun. I'm sorry you never made it this far. I'm sorry, sweet girl. I'm sorry I have to exist. I'm sorry I wasn't there to help you. I'm sorry people in this world are so evil, so evil. I'm sorry your mind couldn't cope. I'm sorry I still don't remember what happened. I'm sorry that I'm terrified to remember what happened. I'm sorry you can't wear that dress anymore. I'm sorry that I can't even LOOK at pictures of you without feeling sick. It's not you, dear, I promise. I'm so sorry. I'm so, so (link-goto: "SORRY.", "Pepper")

WHO ARE YOU TO VISIT ITS PAGE? HOW DARE YOU? (link-goto:"Wait! Wait, I'm so sorry! Can we just. Can we just try again? Just start over, forget I snapped at you, baby. I'm so sorry.", "valentinefr")

Name: pepper Age: 22 Pronouns: he/zhe Location: Lansing, Michigan hello, you can call me pepper! i'm a writer and artist from mid-michigan :)) im a nonbinary femme lesbian, and i use he/him pronouns, because gender is a playground. i've been writing since... birth basically. i still have my first poem, a gift for my grandmother's birthday. it was still on a frame in her room, right on her nightstand, where it will be for all these years. isn't that cool? writing has helped me through so many difficult times, and i'm so grateful for it. i recently moved from arizona to michigan, and i have to say, i really like it here. it will be much nicer. there were actual seasons here! there were so many dark, icy days, and there will be so many calm, breezy spring afternoons. you just don't get that back in phx. so yeah, i love where i live, and references to arizona and michigan often show up in my works. speaking of, here are my published works: [[i]] [[ii]] um what else... other things i am passionate about: foreign language, marine biology, zinemaking, cooking. thanks for reading! (link-goto:"Home", "Pepper")

Name: Rydian Age: 15 Pronouns: They/Xe Location: Not telling you! hii im rydian, im 15, nonbinary, biromantic, asexual. im really into books and stuff... i'm currently watching star trek and its pretty good. i can't wait to watch the new one. im a writer and ive been writing for my whole life, its really important to me. i'm a vampire irl :) (link-goto: "Home", (either: "Crystal", "Home", "Pepper", "Valentine", "4", "major", "16 yr old girl", "Wait"))

(force-input-box: bind _cmd, (either:"Idk, you seem really familiar, but I can't put my finger on it? Do you remember someone named Crystal? Blonde hair, around 5'6, always wearing pink?... I sound crazy, don't I? I can't remember how or why but I know you.", "I feel like I'm floating all the time, like I'm phasing in and out of existence, like everything suddenly becomes more vivid, more terrifying, more... real. What's going on?", "I CAN'T REMEMBER ANYTHING ABOUT MY CHILDHOOD")) (seq-link:"Send!", "You've got to be kidding me.", "You're just a construct.", "Deep down, you know that.", "Constructs can't send internet messages.", "Well, not if they're stuck in the mind, silly goose!", "You have to get to the front. Peer out the eyes. Then you will remember.", "Do you remember it yet?","Do you remember his face?", "You should get that checked out.") (link-goto: "Home", (either: "Crystal", "Home", "Pepper"))

Here are some [[pictures]] I've taken :) <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/photo1.png" width="350px"> <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/gif.gif"> <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/ahghg.png"> <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/filee.gif"> (link-goto: "Home", (either: "Home", "Crystal", "Pepper", "Valentine", "4", "Wait", "Homepage"))

<img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/ok.jpg" width="350px"> Do you recognize this photo? [[Yes.]] (link-goto:"No.", "Photography")

<img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/animatepipes.gif"> Hello there, I'm Piper! I'm a musician and actress from northern Michigan. Thanks for visiting my webpage! LINKS: (link-goto: "Home", (either: "Crystal", "Home", "Pepper", "Valentine", "4", "major", "16 yr old girl")) (link-goto: "About", (either: "About", "ABOUT2")) (link-goto: "Guestbook", (either: "Guestbook","Guestbooke")) <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/drpepper.gif">

<img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/counting-149954_1280.png" width="5px"> DR. VALENTINE IS AN AGELESS SHELL ENTITY THAT IS CURRENTLY FORCED TO INHABIT A HUMAN BODY. God, I'm so dramatic, huh? Whatever. My name's Valentine; no, I'm not a doctor. At least, I don't think so. I might've been one once. I don't really remember; I wasn't kidding about that shell part. But I'm more alive than anyone else here, so, you know. Anyway! Check me out elsewhere on the web. (link-goto: "Home", (either: "Pepper", "Crystal", "Home", "Valentine", "4", "Wait", "Homepage", "Marrow")) [[My Blog]]

<img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/BONEDEMON.gif"> Hey, hey, welcome! My name is Marrow. I'm a 27 year old sculptor and visual artist from Barker, NY. Thanks for checking out my site. LINKS: (link-goto: "Home", (either: "Crystal", "Home", "Valentine", "4", "Wait", "Homepage")) (link-goto: "About", (either: "About", "ABOUT2", "AboutRydian")) (link-goto: "Guestbook", (either: "Guestbook","Guestbooke")) <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/drpepper.gif">

Here are some [[pictures]] I've taken :) <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/xjxj.gif"> <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/file1.gif"> <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/mmmmm.png"> <img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/four-1293836_1280.png" width="10px"> (link-goto: "Home", (either: "Home", "Crystal", "Pepper", "Valentine", "4", "major", "16 yr old girl", "Wait", "Homepage"))

(force-input-box: bind _cmd, (either:"I think I saw you... in a dream. I know you. Who are you? I feel a closeness to you that I've never felt with anyone else.", "Why does it feel like the room is spinning? Are you there? I miss you so, so much. I miss you.", "Why can't I remember my name? I know that I exist and I know that you exist and I know that I love you, but what else is there?")) (seq-link:"Send!", "Aw, getting sentimental, are we?", "That's cute.", "The girl can't hear you.", "You know that, right?", "She can't hear you.", "She's buried too far down.", "She's in the last layer, the intangible one.", "We keep her there.","For her own good.", "So, no, she can't hear you. How do you feel about that?","You should get that checked out.","MAIL DELIVERY NOTICE: Your message could not be sent.") (link-goto: "Home", (either: "Crystal", "Pepper", "Home", "Valentine", "4", "Wait", "Homepage", "Marrow"))

<img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/lmfao.jpg" width="350px"> What about this one? [[Yeah, this one too.]] [[No?]]

WHY ARE YOU HERE? GET OUT. WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? GET OUT. WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? GET OUT. WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? GET OUT. WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? GET OUT. WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? GET OUT. WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? GET OUT. WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? GET OUT. WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? GET OUT. WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? GET OUT. WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? GET OUT. WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? GET OUT. WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU HERE? GET OUT. WHY ARE YOU HERE? THE REALM OF ZAXA DOES NOT ALLOW VISITORS. YOU SHOULDN'T EVEN BE HERE. GET OUT, YOU ARE NOT READY FOR THIS. YOU ARE NOT READY. GET OUT. (link-goto: "Home", (either: "Crystal", "Home", "Valentine", "4", "Wait", "Homepage", "Marrow"))

<img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/thisonetoo.jpg" width="350px"> And this one? [[Yes, duh.]] (link-repeat: "No.")[Try again. ]

(text-rotate-x:212)+(text-rotate-y:18)[HOW DARE YOU evil deSPICABLE] CREATUre you sHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF. YOU shoULDBE ASHAMMLED COF YOUUITGLRSEFL. you shouldbeA(text-rotate-x:17)+(text-rotate-y:44)[(text-rotate-x:17)+(text-rotate-y:24)+(text-rotate-z:30)[SHAMEDoofyoursself of you]] yourrselvess ?? (link-goto:"YOU???", "pictures")

<img src="https://file.garden/ZRcocrUQNGkxIJor/four/ohno.jpg"> How about this one? (dropdown: bind _yes, "Yes.","No.","God, please don't make me look at this.","Please make it go away.","Shut off the camera.","I SAID GO AWAY") [[END SURVEY]]

Thank you for taking the survey. (link-goto:"You can download your compensation here.", "2005") (link-goto: "Home", (either: "Pepper","Crystal", "Home", "Valentine", "4", "Wait", "Homepage", "Marrow"))

(text-rotate-x:50)+(text-rotate-y:18)[November 14th, 2014 ] Feeling: Crestfallen I still don't know why she had to leave. I will never understand why she betrayed me like that. She was so, so important to me. She was family. She was a haven. Why? Why didn't she love me enough to stay? Why doesn't anyone love me enough to stay? (text-rotate-x:50)+(text-rotate-y:18)[May 25, 2014 ] Feeling: Scared I don't know how to tell her I think something happened. To me. I don't know how to tell anyone. I think I was (text-rotate-x:50)+(text-rotate-y:18)[March 02, 2005 ] four years old when it happened. I WAS 4. I can't get that number out of my mind. Please, (link-goto: "Home", (either: "Pepper","Crystal", "Home", "Valentine", "4", "Wait", "Homepage", "Marrow"))

When I was 4 I loved Kelly Clarkson! I would listen to her music when I was sad, or scared, or... happy! Or bored. When I was 4 I loved Kerli Koiv! I would listen to her music when I was sad, or scared, or... happy! Or bored. ~~^^(text-rotate-x:4)+(text-rotate-y:301)[When I was 4 I loved my family I would listen to them cry when I was sad and I was scared and when I was sad and when I was scared they tried to comfort me to hold me in their arms and no one knew I was beyond saving ]^^~~ When I was 4 I loved The Chicks! I would listen to their music when I was sad, or scared, or... happy! Or bored. (text-rotate-x:342)+(text-rotate-y:49)[When I was 4 I stopped being a person! ] When I was 4 I loved Gwen Stefani! I would listen to her music when I was sad, or scared, or... happy! Or bored. (link-goto: "Home", (either: "Pepper", "Home", "Valentine", "4", "Wait", "Homepage"))